Avoiding Actual Human Connection

Welcome to the ultimate guide on how to avoid actual human connection in the 21st century. Because, let's be real, humans are so overrated.

Phase 1: The Isolation Protocols

Step 1: Move to a remote cabin in the woods.

Step 2: Unplug all devices and live off the land.

Step 3: Learn to grow your own food, but don't bother with the emotional support.

Proceed to Phase 2: The Digital Detox

Phase 2: The Digital Detox

Step 1: Delete all social media accounts.

Step 2: Uninstall all video streaming apps.

Step 3: Start wearing a tin foil hat to block out Wi-Fi signals.

Proceed to Phase 3: The Solitude Sanctuary

Phase 3: The Solitude Sanctuary

Step 1: Build a moat around your house with spikes.

Step 2: Install a door that only opens with a secret password.

Step 3: Hire a team of robotic butlers to serve you.

Proceed to Phase 4: The Emotional Nullification