The Sprinkles Advocates

Resolution 1: The Right to a Free Sprinkles

By a unanimous decision, the Sprinkles Advocates committee agrees that all citizens are entitled to a free sprinkles every Friday at precisely 14:47.

WHEREAS the Sprinkles are the greatest culinary delight known to humanity;

WHEREAS the absence of Sprinkles in one's life is a fate worse than death;

THEREFORE the committee resolves that all Sprinkles be made readily available to the public at large.

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Resolution 2: Sprinkles for All

By a vote of 7 to 1, with 2 abstentions, the Sprinkles Advocates committee decides that Sprinkles be made compulsory in all school lunches.

WHEREAS the young minds of our future leaders require a steady diet of Sprinkles to develop properly;

THEREFORE the committee resolves that all schools be equipped with Sprinkles dispensers by the end of fiscal year 20XX.

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Resolution 3: The Sprinkles Oath

By a vote of 9 to 0, with 1 abstention, the Sprinkles Advocates committee decrees that all citizens must swear the Oath of the Sprinkles upon waking each morning:

I, [Name], do solemnly swear to love, honor, and devour Sprinkles for all the days of my life.

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