**Crisis Management Protocol**

1. Identify the crisis: "What's on fire?"

2. Assess the situation: "Is it a 5-alarm emergency or a Tuesday?"

3. Activate the crisis management team: "Get the fire department, the hazmat team, and the catering staff."

4. Develop a plan: "Call in the experts, the consultants, and the committee members who are not on vacation."

5. Execute the plan: "Blaze, baby, blaze!"