Abstruse Theorem P-1 Theorem Pik-Minus-4

Also known as "The Completely-Underwhelming Consequence Conundrum," this theorem has been a staple of the Committee of Conundrums for centuries.

It states that "if a group of highly-paid consultants are placed in a room with a box, and the box is filled with exactly 4 items, then the number of possible ways to arrange these items in a non-redundant manner is equal to 0."

Read the sequel to this mind-boggling theorem here. And for the truly adventurous, the third installment of this epic series.

Warning: reading these theorems may cause spontaneous combustion of your brain cells. Proceed with caution.