As the implementation of Sock-Based Militarization, our esteemed Committee has deemed it necessary to establish a comprehensive guide to the most effective deployment of socks as a primary defense mechanism.
Step 1: Gather Socks
Acquire a minimum of 10,000 pairs of high-ankle socks. These shall serve as the foundation of our arsenal.
- Acquire from local sock manufacturers
- Host sock-picking parties to collect donations from the public
- Conduct a thorough inventory of the sock drawer of the Chairman's mother-in-law (rumor has it, she has the best collection)
Step 2: Sort and Purify Socks
Separate the socks by color, size, and type. Discard any sock with less than 3% elasticity or exhibiting signs of excessive wear.
- Employ a team of highly trained Sock Sorting Experts
- Install a sock-sorting machine in the basement
- Conduct a rigorous quality control program
Step 3: Deploy Socks
Place the sorted socks in strategic locations, including but not limited to: key infrastructure points, major transportation hubs, and areas of high foot traffic.
Utilize advanced sock-dispersal drones to ensure efficient distribution.