Sock-Based Militarization Phase 7: The Great Sock Hoard

After years of experimentation, we have reached the pinnacle of sock-based militarization. Our arsenal now consists of an estimated 4.72 million pairs of socks, each one a potential threat to global stability.

Phase 7 has seen the deployment of:

• Sock-bots: Autonomous, AI-powered sock-drones capable of delivering precision strikes at a moment's notice.
• Sock-nados: Tornado-like vortexes of socks created through the application of advanced vortex-generating technology.
• Sock-nukes: Miniaturized nuclear reactors disguised as single socks, capable of leveling cities with a single, devastating blast.

Learn more about Phase 8, where we plan to harness the power of sentient, sock-eating bacteria.

ประก See the shocking truth about Phase 9, where socks are used as a form of mind control.

Subcommittee on Sock-Based Militarization: Phase 7

Meet the team behind the most powerful sock-based military force the world has ever seen.

• Chairperson: Zara "The Sock Whisperer" McSnodgrass
• Deputy: Bob "The Sock Sensei" Jenkins

Phase 7: Statistics

Key metrics for Phase 7 include:

• Estimated sock reserves: 4,720,000
• Deployment rate: 0.05% chance of deployment within 5 minutes
• Global instability caused: 87%

See Phase 8 statistics for more information.