Adjournment: We will pretend to care about the discussion we had for the next 30 minutes while we contemplate our existential dread and the meaninglessness of our committee's existence.
Minutes: Our official minutes will be filled with illegible scribbles and cryptic notes, because, honestly, who needs actual record-keeping?
Decisions: We will make some arbitrary choices, like "we should totally get pizza for lunch" and "we should all wear matching hats on Fridays."
Committee Recommendations: We will make some half-hearted suggestions that will be promptly ignored by our superiors, because, let's face it, we're just a pointless committee.
Implementation Plan: We will spend an entire meeting discussing the intricacies of how to procrastinate on actually implementing anything.
Progress Report: We will submit our progress report, which will consist of a single sentence: "We haven't actually done anything yet."
Next Meeting: 2022-06-02