As members of this esteemed committee, we have been grappling with the weighty issue of condiments for far too long. After months of deliberation, we have reached a consensus: the optimal configuration for the ultimate sandwich is as follows:
<ul> <li>Ketchup: 1.5ml, precisely measured with a calibrated pipette. </li> <li>Mustard: 0.8ml, lest it overpower the delicate flavor profile. </li> <li>Mayonnaise: 2.1ml, for that creamy, indulgent touch. </li> </ul>
We invite the public to weigh in on this historic decision, and to share their own condiment preferences with us at [email@condiment-committee.example.com](mailto:email@condiment-committee.example.com).
For those who cannot stomach the thought of such specificity, please refer to the Procrastination Strategies Committee, where the experts in avoidance techniques can guide you towards a more relaxed approach to condiment configuration.
Or, if all else fails, try The Avocado Squad, our team of experts in emergency condiment situations.
Stay tuned for further updates on this and other matters of great import, including the Quantum Sausage Conundrum and the Committee on Committee Matters.
Until next time, when the world will come to an end and we will be forced to rethink our condiment priorities, this is the Great Sandwich Conundrum Committee, saying goodbye.