WHEREAS the members of this committee have collectively spent an alarming amount of time pondering the intricacies of existence, the universe, and the human condition; and
WHEREAS it has become clear that we are no closer to understanding the answers, but have developed a deep appreciation for the art of procrastination; and
WHEREAS the world is still full of mysteries that will likely never be solved by our collective efforts; and
WHEREAS we are all secretly terrified that our existence is just a simulation created by a bored deity; and
THEREFORE, be it resolved, that we will continue to meet in this committee to discuss the meaning of life, despite having no actual answers, and will instead focus on developing the world's most extensive collection of coffee mug designs.
Resolution: Committee Resolution 1: Officially Recognizing the Futility of Our Existence