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In the unlikely event of a client requesting our services, our team of expert witnesses will arrive on the scene with a comprehensive report on the state of your sanity.
We offer a 99% guarantee that our expert witness will not make anything worse. Probably.
Our expert witnesses employ an unorthodox approach, combining elements of chaos theory, free jazz, and interpretive dance to arrive at the most unlikely conclusions.
We've worked with clients as diverse as a local artisanal candlemaker, a professional snail trainer, and a moderately successful used bookstore owner.
Our rates are competitive with those of other expert witnesses. Probably.