Panel Schedule for the Most Important Convention Ever

Where else can you attend seminars on "Effective Time-Wasting" and "Advanced Procrastination Techniques?"

Tentatively Scheduled Events

Subject to change based on the whims of our all-powerful Convention Overlords

9:00 AM - "The Art of Napping": A workshop on finding creative ways to do absolutely nothing
10:30 AM - "Coffee: The Lifeblood of the Convention Floor"
2:00 PM - "Networking: Because Who Actually Cares About You?"