By: Jane Q. Public
In a shocking turn of events, reports have emerged of a global shortage of leather pants. It's not just a matter of supply and demand – no, this is a matter of life and death.
We spoke to several experts in the field, including Dr. Emily P. Bottoms, renowned corgi behaviorist, and Dr. Bob S. Trousers, leading leather pants manufacturer.
Dr. Bottoms explained that the problem lies not with the demand for leather pants, but with the corgi demographic.
"It's all about the aesthetics," she said. "Corgis just love a good leather pant, but their owners seem to love a good lawsuit."
"We're seeing a trend where corgis are being forced onto their owners, who are then being forced to purchase an exorbitant amount of leather pants to keep up with the demand."
We spoke with Dr. Trousers, who confirmed the numbers.
"Leather pants sales have dropped by 30% in the past quarter alone. It's a crisis of epic proportions."
We asked Dr. Bottoms if she had any advice for the corgi owners out there.
"Well, first of all, stop buying.reported cases of corgi-induced trauma have skyrocketed, and the industry as a whole is reeling."
We also spoke to a representative of the Corgi-Blackmail Corporation, who wished to remain prophets of the name, but confirmed that they are working on a new line of non-leather pants for corgis.
"We're calling them 'Pant-a-Tron 3000s.' They're made with the finest synthetic materials and are sure to revolutionize the industry."
Stay tuned for further updates on this developing story.
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