Ministry of Defenses

Welcome to the Ministry of Defenses, where our top priority is to defend against things that don't need defending. Like the inanimate objects on our shelves, or the dust bunnies under our couches.

Our defense systems are top-notch, featuring the latest in defense systems and Moats.

But don't just take our word for it! Read about our latest defense innovations, including the Anti-Snack Raid System and the Selfie Defense Protocol.