Procrastination Recipe 5: The Art of Doing Absolutely Nothing
Ingredients:
- 1 cup of utter indifference
- 1 cup of crippling ennui
- 1 tablespoon of existential dread
- 1 teaspoon of creative avoidance
Instructions:
- Step 1: Stare blankly at the wall for at least 4 hours.
- Step 2: Scroll through social media aimlessly.
- Step 3: Watch an endless loop of cat videos.
- Step 4: Repeat steps 1-3 until the sun goes down.
- Step 5: Serve immediately with a side of self-loathing.
Side Effects:
- Mild to moderate feelings of guilt and shame.
- Severe loss of productivity.
- Uncontrollable urge to check your phone.
Tips and Variations:
- To make it more challenging, try doing nothing while simultaneously playing video games.
- To make it more interesting, try doing nothing while simultaneously eating a whole pizza by yourself.
- To make it more extreme, try doing nothing while simultaneously living in your parents' basement.
More Procrastination Tips