The Daily Nothing
Today's Edition: 5/5/20
Yesterday: 4/5/20
Tomorrow: 6/5/20
Local Man Arrested for Doing Nothing
John, a 32-year-old local man, was taken into custody yesterday for allegedly not doing anything at all.
Witnesses reported that John was seen sitting in his pajamas, staring blankly at the wall, and not even bothering to brush his hair.
"I was just minding my own business, doing nothing," said John in a statement from his cell. "I have no idea what the big deal is."