Well, aside from the obvious "I get to wear nice clothes and have a fancy beard" aspect, we're actually here to guide you through the minefield of existence.
We're not really sure, but they seem to be a recurring theme. Maybe it's just a midlife crisis or maybe it's because our deity is a bit of an edgelord.
Our advice? Just add more cat pictures to your phone. It won't fix everything, but it's a good starting point.