As of today, all members of this institution are required to sport a majestic moustache at all times. Failure to comply will result in severe penalties, including but not limited to:
A moustache of the following specifications is considered acceptable:
Exceptions to this policy may be made for individuals with a documented medical condition that prevents the growth of a moustache. Please provide medical documentation to the Committee of One for review and approval.
Decision 004: Mandatory Socks Policy