As of today, any and all infractions will result in an immediate and severe response. Your browser will be flagged for review by our team of highly trained, yet slightly sadistic, engineers.
We will not tolerate any of the following:
- Slow loading times
- Unclear navigation
- Unsolicited cat pictures
- Misuse of Comic Sans
Repeat offenders will be subject to the following penalties:
- Auto-redirects to a never-ending loop of cat videos
- Forced viewing of our corporate safety video
- Randomized font sizes and styles
- Unsolicited, yet persistent, pop-ups
Don't say we didn't warn you.