Q: What is the purpose of a meeting?

A: To slowly drive colleagues to the brink of madness with PowerPoint presentations.

Q: How long should I stand by the conference table?

A: Until someone else gets there first, then just stand there anyway.

It's just good sense. You're not going to be able to focus on the meeting if you're worried about your caffeine levels.

Unless explicitly invited, do not touch the conference table. It's like a sacred altar, except it's not.

Just in case someone tries to get all corporate on you. Trust us, it will happen.