Dear valued customer,
We understand that sometimes, life can get in the way and payments get missed. However, we cannot stress this enough:
Our late payment fees are not to be underestimated. They are the stuff of nightmares, the bane of budgets, and the root of all evil.
We're not here to judge. We're just here to collect.
$50 for every day, $100 for every day if you're a repeat offender
Don't say we didn't warn you.
We have a team of highly trained, highly caffeinated professionals who are ready to pounce on your account at a moment's notice. Don't test us.
- We charge late payment fees for all services rendered, minus the ones we don't.
- We charge late payment fees for all services not rendered, plus interest.
- We charge late payment fees for services rendered and unrendered, just to be safe.
We're not kidding around. Pay on time, folks.
See our Late Payment Fee Methods page for more information on how we get our claws on your money.
Or, you know, just pay us already.
Best regards,
The Fictitious Bureaucracy