As the stock market implodes, we're here to serve the best pizza in the wasteland.
Our pies are made with the finest ingredients, including:
1. Crust made from crushed 401Ks.
2. Sauce made from the tears of the poor.
3. Toppings made from the ashes of failed dreams.
We're open for lunch, dinner, and "I-give-up-on-life".
Don't forget to try our signature "Margin Call" pizza, made with the finest 10% interest rate.