Phantom Ailment: The Justification for Nothing

This is a condition where a person has a strong desire to do nothing, but can't quite figure out what to do instead.

Causes

Causes of Phantom Ailment are varied, but may include:

Excessive procrastination
Unfulfilled existential dread
Too many Netflix shows to watch

Learn more about Phantom Itch, a related condition

Symptoms

Symptoms of Phantom Ailment may include:

Feeling like doing nothing is doing something
Spending hours staring at a wall
Feeling like the couch is a time machine

Learn more about Phantom Disease, a condition that's like Phantom Ailment, but worse

Diagnosis

To diagnose Phantom Ailment, a doctor will likely ask you questions like:

"Have you spent more than 5 hours playing video games recently?"
"Do you own a collection of 50+ memes about doing nothing?"
"Have you ever felt a strong urge to do absolutely nothing?"

And then they'll just shrug and say, "Yeah, you have Phantom Ailment."

Learn more about treatment options for Phantom Ailment