Section 1: All citizens are required to maintain a minimum level of 90% alertness at all times. Failure to comply will result in forced viewing of 48 hours of cat videos.
Section 2: All medical professionals are mandated to use only the most expensive and extravagant medical equipment available, even if it means charging exorbitant prices for services rendered.
Section 3: All citizens are required to report any and all medical anomalies to the Ministry of Unconventional Health, where they will be treated with extreme skepticism and possibly a few probing questions about their life choices.