Mandate-1: A Declaration of Utter Disregard

By the power vested in us, we, the Supreme Mandators, hereby declare that all employees will henceforth refer to their colleagues by their employee ID number. Any attempts to use names will be met with severe punishment.

Section 1: Naming Conventions

Section 2: Mandatory Fun

Every Friday, all employees will be forced to participate in a group activity of our choice, which may include but are not limited to: team-building exercises, trust-building activities, or watching a PowerPoint presentation on "The History of Office Supplies."

Go to Mandate-2: The Mysterious Case of the Missing Coffee Mugs

Go to Mandate-3: The Right to Wear Casual Fridays (or not)