By the power vested in us, all forms must be filled out in triplicate, and then signed in quadruplicate.
Failure to comply will result in a sternly worded letter, and possibly a visit from our friends in the Bureaucratic Enforcement Agency.
For more information, see Mandate 11: The Form-Filling Frenzy.
Section 2, subsection A: All fines will be levied at a rate of $100.00 per incident.
Section 2, subsection B: You will be required to attend a mandatory seminar on "The Importance of Following Procedures".
For more information, see Mandate 12: The Seminar Shuffle.
First-time offenders will be subject to a $500.00 fine.
Repeat offenders will be subject to a $1000.00 fine, and possibly a stint in our state-of-the-art Holding Facility.
For more information, see Mandate 13: The Fine and Dandy.
If you have any questions or concerns, please don't hesitate to contact us.
We'll get to it... eventually.
For more information, see Mandate 14: The Appeals Process (or Lack Thereof).
Remember: Compliance is key. Or is it?
Fine print: This mandate may be printed, but it's not worth the paper it's not written on.
Note: All fines and penalties are subject to change without warning.
Also, we're not actually a government agency. Or are we?