MANDATE 9: WEAR PINK TIE

By order of the Ministry of Mandatory Fashion, all citizens are required to don a pink tie on Tuesdays. Failure to comply will result in penalties including, but not limited to, being forced to watch an endless loop of 80s power ballads and being denied access to the city's best tapwater.

Remember, citizens, a pink tie is not just a fashion statement, it's a matter of national security.