It's 2021, and the world is ripe for the taking. Or, rather, for the guac-ing. Avocados have been a staple in health-conscious hipster circles for years, but now they've reached critical mass, and a full-blown cult has emerged.
The Avocadoculture is a mystical, yet trendy, movement that worships the mighty avocado as a symbol of wellness, sustainability, and aestheticism. Its adherents can be spotted sipping green juice, wearing artisanal, locally-sourced clothing, and obsessively posting about their avocado-themed everything on Instagram.
But beware, friend, for the Avocadoculture is not for the faint of heart. Its initiates must undergo a rigorous initiation process, which includes but is not limited to:
Those who have completed the initiation process are rewarded with a badge of honor, which looks suspiciously like an avocado pit, and a lifetime supply of free avocado-themed merchandise.