Breaking News:

Ketchup, that classic condiment, has been given a radical redesign.

Our team of expert condiment consultants at Spec-Spec Labs have taken the traditional ketchup bottle and turned it into a sleek, modern masterpiece.

Key features of the new design include:

• Thicker, more aggressive border - because who needs subtlety?
• Brighter, more eye-searing color - because ketchup is supposed to be the life of the party!
• A new, ergonomic shape - because who needs a bottle that fits in your pocket?

We're not just stopping at ketchup, folks. Stay tuned for:

Soyleently Enthusiastic: Soy Sauce Gets a Makeover

And:

Mayo Goes Undercover