Marketing Meeting Minutes for the Secret Project

Attendee: Sarah Jones (Marketing Manager)

Project Goal: To increase sales by 500% while pretending it's a real goal

Discussion Points:

• We will pretend to care about customer feedback.
• We will create a social media buzzword list.
• We will make the competition hate us.

Next Steps:

• Meet with the CEO to discuss his ego
• Send out a mass email to customers saying "Hey, we're not ignoring you, we're just busy."

Follow-up Meeting

Notes:

• Sarah made eye contact with the CEO for 5 seconds, which is a new record.
• The coffee machine was turned off, but not really.

Decisions:

• We will have another meeting next week, but only if we have to.