Voidus Protocol: Meetings for the Chronically Disinterested

Meetings. The bane of productivity. The nemesis of focus. The scourge of sanity.

That's why we've developed the Voidus Protocol: a system designed to extract the last vestiges of enthusiasm from even the most hardened avoidant.

Step 1: Set an alarm clock to go off 5 minutes before the meeting. This will give you just enough time to pretend you're interested.

Step 2: Arrive late, but not so late that it's suspicious. The goal is to be just enough of a presence to be noticed, but not enough to actually participate.

Step 3: Sit in the back, near the exit. This will give you an easy escape route for when you need to make a break for it.

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