It has been a wild ride, folks. Our agents in the field have reported the following highlights of recent mayhem:
- The Great Cheese Toast Insurrection of '23: A rogue batch of artisanal toast was discovered, sparking a 48-hour uprising in the break room.
- The Sudden and Unexplained Abduction of Coffee Mugs: A string of bizarre occurrences has led to the disappearance of 17 mugs from the break room, with many suspecting a sinister plot by a rogue coffee cart.
- The Mysterious Case of the Missing Donut Box: A box of freshly baked donuts went missing, prompting a full-scale investigation and a series of cryptic clues.
We are still investigating these incidents, but rest assured, our Adjutants are on top of it.
Stay vigilant, citizens. The Committee of Mayhem is watching.