• Learn to play 5 minutes of Solitaire
• Practice your 'I'm on my way' face
• Create a fake to-do list for your cat
• Invent an exotic new sport

Warning: The following techniques are highly addictive and may lead to permanent damage to your productivity.

1. Learn to play 5 minutes of Solitaire. This will give you the perfect excuse to say 'I'm on my way' when someone asks you to do something productive.

2. Practice your 'I'm on my way' face in the mirror. This will help you develop the necessary facial muscles to pull off the perfect procrastination excuse.

3. Create a fake to-do list for your cat. This will give you a legitimate reason to spend 4 hours making a to-do list for your cat.

4. Invent an exotic new sport. This will give you the perfect excuse to spend all day watching cat videos on YouTube.

5. Learn to play the trombone with your feet. This will give you the perfect excuse to spend all day playing music instead of attending meetings.

6. Create a fake meeting invite with a 10-year-old as the guest of honor. This will give you the perfect excuse to take a 3-hour break to play with a 10-year-old.