OMNISCIENTIAL BUREAUCRACY

Section 1: The Omnisciential Bureaucracy's Guide to Doing Nothing

Step 1: Wait 30 minutes for someone to respond to your email.

Step 2: If no one responds, wait 30 more minutes.

Proceed to Step 3: Send an email to the wrong department.

Consult Bureaucratic Red Tape for further instructions.

Section 2: The Art of Bureaucratic Red Tape

Bureaucratic Red Tape: The Unofficial Bureaucratic Guide to Getting Lost in a Sea of Paperwork.

Step 1: Fill out Form 27-B.

Step 2: Attach 3 copies of your ID.