Meetings. The lifeblood of productivity, the bane of sanity. In the ancient world, we didn't have email, or video conferencing, or even a reliable supply ofæk. But we still managed to make meetings a thing of beauty. Or at least, a thing of mild annoyance.
Meetings, you see, were a way of life. A way of life that consisted of gathering around a fire, talking loudly, and repeating the same points until someone nodded off.
We have it on good authority that the great prophet, Aziz the Unremarkable, once held a meeting that lasted 12 days straight. 12 days! And still, no one was able to decide on the meaning of life.
Meetings: the ancient art of doing nothing. A delicate dance of pointless discussions, awkward silences, and the occasional, desperate attempt to make eye contact with the person who's not paying attention.
| Meeting Type | Duration | Outcome |
|---|---|---|
| The Pointless Meeting | 6 hours 37 minutes | Nothing |
| The Slightly Less Pointless Meeting | 3 hours 14 minutes | Some notes were taken |
| The Meeting That Should Never Have Happened | 1 hour 47 minutes | We still can't remember |
In conclusion, meetings are a thing of beauty. A thing of futility, perhaps, but still, a thing of beauty.
Or, at the very least, a thing that will always be there to waste your time and make you feel like a productive member of society.
Thanks for reading, folks!
Don't forget to attend our next meeting, where we will discuss the meaning of the word "next meeting"!