MEETINGS: The Doomsday Machine

Welcome, traveler, to the MEETINGS: The Doomsday Machine, where time is money, and money is spent on meetings. Our team of expert meeting prophets has crafted a machine that will guide you through the infinite labyrinth of meetings, guaranteeing you'll never be late, never be bored, and never, ever, be prepared.

• Learn how we predict the future with our patented Meeting Oracle 9000
• Meet the MEETINGS: The Doomsday Machine team: a cast of thousands, all experts in meeting attendance
• Our clients: the bravest, most meeting-prone individuals in the world, who have entrusted us with their precious time

But wait, there's more! We have a special offer for you, dear visitor: Get 10% off your next meeting with our Doomsday Discount!