Flood Simulations

Because our office is basically a sinking ship, we need to know how to deal with the impending doom.

Run More Simulations Evacuation Protocol

Simulation Results

Our latest simulation results indicate a 99.9% chance of drowning in meetings.

However, we are confident that our meeting prophets will guide us through this treacherous time.

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Our Prophets

We have assembled a team of experts in the field of meeting prophecy.

They will guide us through the coming flood of pointless discussion and bureaucratic red tape.

Our prophets have predicted:

Join Our Prophets' Training Program

Evacuation Protocol

When the floodwaters rise, follow these steps:

  1. Grab your laptop and your "I survived a meeting" survival kit
  2. Head to the nearest emergency exit (which will probably be locked)
  3. Call our emergency hotline: 1-800-MEETING