Q: What is the difference between a prophet and a psychic?
A: Our prophets are 100% more accurate and only charge $50/minute for readings, whereas our psychics charge $100/minute but only 75% accurate.
Q: How do you predict the apocalypse?
A: We employ advanced techniques, including but not limited to, tarot card reading, astrology, and interpreting chicken entrails.
Q: What's the deal with the chicken entrails?
A: We use them to predict the alignment of the planets. It's science!
Warning: This is a highly experimental technology that may not actually predict zombies. Or, who knows, maybe it will.