As the world descends into chaos and despair, the Prophets of the Apocalypse have deemed it necessary to establish a new protocol for the use of toilet paper in times of crisis.

It is hereby decreed that toilet paper shall be used as armor, to be worn at all times when facing:

• Marauding hordes of zombies
• Armageddon-level solar flares
• Alien invasions
• Government mandated broccoli diets

Prophetically speaking, toilet paper is the answer to all of life's problems.

Subpage: What to Eat When the Zombies Are at the Door

Subpage: Using Toilet Paper as Shield