Redundant Meetings: The Art of Filling Space with Unnecessary Verbiage

Meetings: the bane of our existence. Or are they? In this series, we explore the delicate art of making meetings even longer and more confusing.

Technique 1: The Overwhelming Introduction

Start your meeting with a 10-minute intro that sets the tone for the rest of the meeting. Cover topics that have nothing to do with the actual agenda.

• Define the weather outside.
• Discuss the meaning of life.
• Read from a book that has nothing to do with the topic.

Technique 2: The Art of Digressing

Make a 5-minute detour every 2 minutes into a tangentially related topic.

• Discuss the history of the coffee machine in the break room.
• Share a story about your favorite childhood memory.
• Make a PowerPoint presentation on "The Importance of Squirrel Chasing in Modern Business."

Technique 3: The Power of Jargon

Redundant Meetings: The Art of Filling Space with Unnecessary Verbiage

Meetings: the bane of our existence. Or are they? In this series, we explore the delicate art of making meetings even longer and more confusing.

Technique 4: The Overuse of Buzzwords

Use every buzzword you can think of, even if they're mutually exclusive.

• Synergy
• Paradigm
• Disrupt
• Synergy-disrupt

And don't forget to use them in sentences that don't make sense!

Technique 5: The Infinite Loop

Repeat the same question or statement over and over, waiting for someone to respond.

• "What is the status of the project?"
• "Can anyone tell me the status of the project?"
• "Is anyone aware of the status of the project?"

Someone, anywhere, please!

Want to know more? Check out Overuse of Sarcasm.

Or perhaps Paradigm Shift might interest you?