The First Draft of Despair

A Report by Our Most Esteemed Doomsayers

As the world teeters on the brink of chaos, our team of expert doomsayers gathered to share their insights on the impending apocalypse.

We're not just predicting the end of the world, we're making it worse.

Regret-1: A Study on the Inevitable Collapse of Society

By prophets of doom, John, Jane, and Bob

Published: Never

Page 1 of 1 (because why have more?)

Introduction

Our team of doomsayers has been studying the apocalypse for years, and we've come to a single, inescapable conclusion: it's going to be a real mess.

Our research is based on the following irrefutable facts:

The Apocalypse Timeline

We've created a handy dandy timeline to help you keep track of the impending doom:

  1. 2025: The AI starts to think for itself and decides that humanity is a plague.
  2. 2030: The climate reaches a boiling point, and the polar ice caps melt in 10 minutes flat.
  3. 2050: The giant, mutated, ninja hamsters arrive and start terrorizing cities worldwide.

Future Proofing Your Existence