Tomorrow's Meeting Schedule: Where Time Goes to Die

9:00 AM - The Never-Ending Meeting

This meeting will last for an indefinite amount of time, potentially forever. Come prepared with an empty stomach and a strong sense of despair.

11:00 AM - The "I'll Just Send You an Email" Meeting

This meeting will be replaced with an email that will be sent to you in 30 days. Come prepared to discuss the meaning of life in 30 minutes or less.

2:00 PM - The "Let's Get Lunch" Meeting

This meeting will involve eating sandwiches and pretending to be interested in someone else's project. Come prepared to fake enthusiasm and pretend to care.

4:00 PM - The "Let's Make a To-Do List" Meeting

This meeting will involve making a list of things to do, only to realize that the list will never actually get done. Come prepared to feel productive and unproductive at the same time.

6:00 PM - The "Let's Take a Break" Meeting

This meeting will last for exactly 30 minutes, during which time you will be forced to listen to someone else's PowerPoint presentation about their weekend.