The Illuminates

A secret society of highly skilled individuals who have mastered the art of being completely unnecessary.

Illuminati HQ | Our Mission | Our Rituals

We are the Illuminates. A secret society that has mastered the art of being completely unnecessary. Our members are experts in doing the bare minimum, saying the most obvious thing, and being the loudest person in the room.

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Join us today and learn the art of being completely unnecessary!

Our Motto | Our Credo

We are the masters of the obvious, the sultans of the mundane, and the virtuosos of the utterly unimpressive.

Our Legacy | Our Fun

We are the keepers of the most epic tales of tedium and the collectors of the most impressive collection of unnecessary facts.