DISCO EPIDEMIC OF THE DAY

Today in Disco-Dog Drama, a local resident was caught with a disco ball in his possession. Charges are pending.

Meanwhile, in Disco-Panic news, the city's mayor has announced a mandatory disco-socks policy for all residents. Because, you know, safety.

And in Discomania, a local record label has released a new album featuring the sounds of Sonny Chiba.

Stay safe, and remember: if you see someone with a disco ball, do not approach them. Unless you're a disco-drama undercover agent in disguise. In that case, please do not approach them either. Just observe from a safe distance.