"Team" Building: Where We Pretend to Like Each Other

Hi, we're Team Emily! A group of individuals who have somehow managed to tolerate each other's presence for more than 5 minutes. Our motto is: "We're not a team, we're just people in the same room."

Our Team Members

• Emily: The De facto Leader (in her own mind)
• Steve: The Guy Who Always Has a Sandwich
• John: The Guy Who Always Has an Opinion (even when nobody asked)

Our Mottos (we have two)

1. We're not a team, we're just people in the same room.

2. We're all secretly watching cat videos on our phones during meetings.

Our Goals

1. Survive another meeting without someone falling asleep.

2. Find a way to get out of the break room without getting stuck in the vending machine.

Our Values

1. We value our personal space, but not really.

2. We value our snacks, always.

Meet our heroes: the coffee machine and the water cooler