Welcome to the Caffeine Injector Methodology, where we inject just the right amount of caffeine into your system to get you through even the most mundane Monday.
Our patented process involves a combination of high-pressure coffee shots, strategically placed coffee breaks, and an extensive collection of coffee-themed motivational posters.
Take our simple quiz to determine the severity of your caffeine deficiency.
Our expert injectors will administer a precisely measured dose of caffeine into your system.
As the caffeine takes hold, you'll experience a surge in productivity, a decrease in existential dread, and an increase in creative problem-solving skills.
Proceed to Aftercare: Managing Your Newfound Caffeine-fueled Euphoria
Learn how to navigate the challenges of being a highly caffeinated individual in the modern workplace.
Stay safe, stay caffeinated.