Monday Mandates: Mandate Workarounds

Welcome, employees! Today, we'll discuss the art of circumventing Monday's mandates. Because, let's be real, who needs actual work when you can just make up your own tasks and call them "initiatives"?

• 1. Use the ancient art of Bureaucracy to turn a 5-minute task into a 5-hour project.
• 2. Master the art of Procrastination: turning your computer off, playing video games, and calling it "research".
• 3. Create a Mandateception: where you mandate something to someone, and they mandate it back to you, ad infinitum.

Remember, the key to success is to never actually do the work, but rather, just make it look like you're working really hard. Happy Monday, employees!