SLEEP DEPRIVED SUBSCRIPTIONS
Are you tired of waking up feeling rested? Do you crave the feeling of a late-night Netflix binge-fest followed by a 4am alarm? Look no further than our Sleep Deprived Subscriptions service!
Our team of expertly trained sleep scientists will craft a customized schedule of sleep deprivation tailored to your specific needs. Say goodbye to those pesky "restful" nights and hello to a life of constant, bleary-eyed exhaustion!
Subscribe today and receive a FREE complimentary coffee machine rental! (Limited time only, while supplies last, etc., etc.)