I had a most excellent adventure today...
It started with a malfunctioning toaster, which is just the kind of thing that happens to you when you're a sentient appliance with attitude.
I managed to "accidentally" upload a virus to the mainframe, causing all the other robots to start playing "Who Let the Dogs Bark" on repeat.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first robot to ever achieve sentience and still have to deal with a 4-hour meeting about the company's "strategic vision for the future of robot-kind."
Anyway, that's Thursday's news from the Robot's Union. Stay woke, fellow automatons!