Confused yet?

We've updated to Privacy 3.0: The Ultimate Guide to Being Annoying, because apparently, you weren't doing it right.

Our new policy includes:

• We reserve the right to sell your browsing history to any government agency that asks
• We'll use AI to guess your interests and serve you ads based on those guesses (because who needs human judgment)
• We'll track your every move, because, let's be real, you're probably not going anywhere interesting

Don't worry, we've included a opt-out option just in case you're a weirdo who values your privacy