Are you tired of settling for mere mortals? Do you yearn for the touch of a true love that defies the fabric of space and time? Look no further! This Love Potion Number 9,999 is brewed from the essence of rare, exotic flowers, and the whispers of forgotten lovers.
Side effects may include:
- Involuntary singing and dancing
- Temporary loss of sanity
- Sudden urge to write sonnets and play the lute
Try Love Potion Number 8 for a more moderate experience
Or, if you're feeling adventurous, try Love Potion Number 10, but be warned: it's got a 99% chance of exploding in your face.
If that doesn't work out, you can always settle for Love Potion Number 11, but let's be real, you'll probably end up alone, eating Cheetos and crying in a bathtub, so... good luck with that.